


We Used To Have Everything

by lilymcenvy



Category: Celtic Thunder (Band), Supernatural
Genre: AU, Apocalypse, F/M, M/M, Zombies
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-26
Updated: 2017-09-13
Packaged: 2018-04-06 06:44:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4211964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilymcenvy/pseuds/lilymcenvy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She can barely remember the person she used to be before the whole world came crumbling down like a house of cards.<br/>Her life was kind of perfect. She used to have everything. Now all she has left is hope.<br/>Hope that there's still someone... something good in this world.<br/>And that hope is the only thing that keeps her going... surviving.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

She's standing by the corner of one of the houses in the town to which she arrived just this morning. She knows the town quite well. She'd been here a couple of times before all of this happened and she's already visited one place to make food suplies for a few next days.

She hasn't even make her way to the city center and she can already hear that so familiar sound of walkers roaming around. So she's just standing here quietly, looking 'round carefully, waiting to see any movement. She's almost afraid to breath. She hates this feeling... Her father always tought her to be brave, not to be afraid of anything. But since the world went to shit, a few weeks ago, it's getting harder and harder for her to hold it together. And now she's also all alone for this. She's been for a week now. And she's just tired of it. But still... The thought of giving up has never occur to her. Never! If she goes down, she will go down fighting. She will fight till her very last breath.

She tries to recognize which direction the sound's coming from so she can decide where to go next.

She's getting low on amo and she knows there's an army shop in the town so she needs to get there, as soon as possible, so she can get out from the town before the sun goes down. She's not planning to sleep in the city, it's not a good idea, it's full of walkers and she's not gonna risk trying to clear any of the houses to stay in for the night. That's just crazy and too dengerous.

It's already quite late in the afternoon so she really needs to get moving.

So she turns to the street on the right and just starts walking. She's basically creeping along the wall, watching her steps carefully so she can be sure she won't stumble upon anything and make any noise.

One block is behind her, she's at another crossroad. So far, so good.

But just as she's crossing the street, from the corner of her eye she can see movement.

As she turns her head in that direction, she automatically reaches for the knife pinned to her belt.

But it's not a walker... Well, at least, she thinks it's not a walker. She can see a man slowly walking along the street, in the direction away from where she is. He's quite far from her but she can tell... By the way he walks, trying to stay down and not to make any sound. He just looks alive. She smiles for herself, she hasn't met any living person in a week.

Then she slowly starts following him but she still keeps the distance.

It definitely looks like he knows exactly where he's heading. And that could be a good thing.

But then she notices he actually doesn't carry any weapon... At all! And well... That's a really bad thing. She just hopes there are at least some weapons at whatever place he's staying at.

She looks at the street ahead. Right away she sees the only hotel of the town standing just on the corner at the end of the street. She would swear she just saw a movement behind its glass front doors.

 _"There are actually some people left in this town,"_  goes through her head and she feels a wave of excitement and happines running through her body. But, well... Too soon.

The man, seeing he's just few steps away from the safe place, stops being carefull. His eyes are fixed at the hotel, he just doesn't care for anything else. So he doesn't notice three walkers coming from behind the corner at the end of the street that's just a few meters in front of him.

So many thoughts run through her mind in that second. She wants to yell at him, to warn him... But she can't. She doesn't want to attract more walkers to them. So she just runs to help him... To save him.

By the time the man notices the danger, it's already too late. In a second he's on the ground with the walkers on top of him. He starts screaming and she can feel the fear filling every cell in her body. She gets there and just knows it's too late for the man. She quickly kills all three walkers. She's already used to doing that and she's got a lot of experience with it. 

Then she looks down at the man... "Oh, no!" she whispers. He looks so young. Can't be more than just a few years older than her.

There is so much blood. She can see one deep bite on his shoulder, another one on his neck and one more on his forearm.

He's looking up at her, desperately gasping for his last breaths.

"I'm so sorry," she whispers again as she kneels next to him.

"Thank you," he says so quietly that she can barely hear him and then he closes his eyes.

She still has the knife in one hand and she knows what she has to do. The man breaths out for the last time.

"I'm so sorry," she says again. Then she makes sure he won't come back.

When she stands up again, her hands are shaking. She takes a deep breath and looks around. The street seems empty.

Then she turns her head to the hotel entrance. She can definitely see movement there now and walks towards it.

When she's standing right in front of it, she can see two men behind the glass. She immediately realises she knows their faces. But before she can think about it, they open the door for her. As she's passing them, they both give her a wierd look, she would swear they look like they're afraid of her. Then they shut the door behind her and follow her to the hotel lobby.

As she walks in, she's actually surprised by how many people are there.

It's quiet for a moment. She knows that's because through the glass entrance they probably saw what happened out on the street and they definitely look shocked. But at least she has a little bit of time to look around. She realises she actually knows the most of the people. Though they don't know her.

Two men who were standing by the door are now in front of her with all the others and it's actually Colm Keegan and Emmet Cahill. Then there are Keith Harkin and Neil Byrne standing on the right, leaning with their backs against the reception counter. Near them are Laura and Nicole from Celtic Thunder band. On the left she can see Ryan Kelly standing next to a blond woman she doesn't know, and then there's George Donaldson, of course. He's standing right in front of her and after few silent minutes he actually makes a few steps towards her.

"I... I am really sorry about your friend," she manages to say. She can feel her knees are still shaking.

"You killed him!" says the blond woman.

"No, I didn't. Those fuckers did. I just... Made sure he stays dead... And I'm sorry about that."

"How could you do that?" the woman replies angrily.

She doesn't really know what to say.

"Calm down, Meggie," George says calmly.

"No, George! She just killed my brother!" she's practically yelling at that moment.

"Look... Meggie..." she says, trying to stay calm even though she's getting irritated by this woman, "I'm really sorry about your brother. But I didn't kill him!"

"We know," George says, "I guess we should thank you... For taking care of... Those fuckers, as you called them," he gives her a little smile.

"You don't have to thank me, George."

He looks surprised: "You know me?"

"Oh... Well... I think I know all of you... Kinda."

"So you're a fan?" Keith asks.

"Yeah... I was... Now I'm not a fan of anything," she shrugs.

"So what's your name, darlin'?" Neil smiles at her.

"Name's Lily. Nice to meet you all."

"You too," they all reply.

Except Meggie: "Are we really going to ignore the fact she just killed my brother?"

"Oh, God! For the last time! I didn't kill him!" Lily says, "And by the way... What was he thinking anyway? Going out without any weapon?" she turns to George.

But Meggie replies: "We don't use weapons!"

And for a second Lily just stands there, not able to speak.

"What exactly do you mean by that?" she asks then.

"We don't need them."

"Duh... Yes, you do!"

"No, we don't!" Meggie doesn't give up easily.

"Guys! How come you're still alive? If you don't have any weapons?" Lily turns to George again because she's just too irritated by Meggie to talk to her.

"We've been here for the whole time. And yeah, we actually didn't need any weapons," George responds.

"What? It's been already a few weeks since... You know... Shit happened...How did you even manage to stay put for so long... Without going out there?" she poins to the door.

"Well, there was quite a lot of food in hotel restaurant... So we just made sure the ground floor is safe, we locked ourselves in and stayed here," Neil answers.

"So you have food?"

"We ran out yesterday," Keith says with a sad smile, "That's why Timmy went out today... Sadly it turned out very badly. Didn't help anyone."

"Well, lucky you!" she smiles, takes her backpack off and heads for the reception counter, "I know where to go in this town and I managed to get some supplies earlier today, so..." she says as she opens the backpack and gets all her food out to make quite a big pile on the counter, "It's not much. And it's mostly just energy bars, but well... Energy is what you need, right?"

"You're an angel!" Keith laughs and out of the blue he's hugging her tightly. She chuckles, he pulls away and takes an energy bar from the pile.

"Keith, wait!" George says and Keith freezes in the middle of move, "We can't take it."

"Why?" Lily asks.

"You got that food for yourself, we can't take it from you. It's just not right," he shakes his head.

"Don't worry 'bout it, really!" she smiles, "I'm not hungry now. And we'll find more food."

"We?" he raises one eyebrow, "I mean... Don't tell me you wanna stay here with us?"

"Of course I don't wanna stay here. But... I don't want you to stay here either," she says and everybody's quiet, "Look, guys!" she sighs, "Sorry to break it to you, but you can't stay here. You need to get out of here, get out of town... It's not safe here. It might seem like it is but it really isn't. I can take you some place safe... If you're willing to go with me," she says with a little smile and waits for them to answer.

"I'm in," Keith nods, smiling ear to ear. And everyone else agrees with him. Maggie does a weird sound but doesn't say a word so Lily just ignores it: "'Kay, cool. I'm tired of travelling alone anyway," she smiles.

"What? You killed all your friends?" Meggie asks with a grin. And to Lily that just feels like Meggie would stab her in the chest.

Before anyone can realise it, Lily's pointing her gun at Meggie's head: "Say it again and I swear I'm gonna shoot you in the face!" she whispers through her clenched teeth. Nobody moves. They definitely didn't expect that. "Don't you fucking dare!" Lily says, her voice full with anger, "You have no fucking idea how bad it is out there," her voice breaks, but her hand is still, she knows how to handle a gun, "A week ago I watched my two best friends being ripped to pieces... So don't you fucking dare!"

Then Ryan manages to collect himself enough to step in front of Meggie and slowly reach his hands to Lily: "Please, Lil', just put the gun down. Meggie didn't mean it," he shakes his head.

"Of course she didn't," she says sarcastically and after one more second she puts the gun down and back into holster on her belt.

"I'm sorry about your friends," George says.

"Yeah, well... Me too," she sighs.

"Darlin'... You're bleeding," Nicele says with fear in her voice. She's looking at Lily's leg and Lily looks down too: "Fuck! Totally forgot about this!" she curses. She actually really forgot about that. She hurt herself when she was getting food supplies earlier. There was a walker who caught her off guard and pushed her down before she managed to kill him. As she was falling she cut her thigh with a piece of broken glass that was there. It was pretty deep but she just didn't have time to do anything about it. So she just put a bandage she had in the backpack around it and made a mental note to take care of it later. And now would be a good time to do that.

"You're bitten?" Emmet asks, his voice's shaking.

She shakes her head: "Am not. Just cut myself. And anyway... Even if I was bitten, what would you do? If you don't have any weapon... Politely ask me to go away? Don't think it would work... Guys! Open your eyes, you NEED weapons! But don't worry, we'll get you some," she smiles, "Now... Do you happen to have any alcohol here? Need to take care of the wound."

"We have, actually," Neil says, goes around the counter and brings her a half-full bottle of what looks like a really good and expensive scotch.

"Oh, what a waste!" she sighs. But there's nothing else she can use, "Thanks," she gives Neil a smile. Then she finds a first aid kit in her backpack and sits down on the floor with her back against the counter: "Guys, just eat something, okay?! And give me a sec..." she says, carefully taking off the bandage.

Everyone takes a little something from the pile of food and starts eating while watching her. She looks down at her wound and sighs. It's really deep. It's not the first time she hurt herself but it's actually the first time she has to make stitches by herself. Her best friend always did it for her. It just somehow doesn't hurt so much when somebody else does it for her. But, well... Now she just has to do it.

So she opens the bottle of alcohol and takes a few gulps before pouring some of it on the wound. And... It burns like hell. She punches the floor with her fist and closes her eyes, leaning back of her head against the counter. 

"Shit!" she whispers when she opens her eyes again. Then she takes a needle with a piece of thread from the first aid kit and pour a little bit of alcohol on it too

She takes a deep breath before making the first stitch. Her hands are shaking. It just hurts so much. The wound's still bleeding a lot and by the time she's making the second stitch, her sight is getting little blurry.

"Oh, honey, I just can't watch this! Let me help you," Nicole says and goes to sit on the floor next to her. She pours alcohol on her hands and takes the needle from Lily. She nods but doesn't say a word. She's so grateful to Nicole. She just closes her eyes and lets Nicole do the rest of the stitches for her. Though the pain is not so bad anymore, Lily just feels so weak for not being able to do what needs to be done. She can feel tears making their way into her eyes but she knows she just can't cry. She can't show weakness to others. So she takes a deep breath to pull herself together and opens her eyes again. She can see Nicole's already making the last stitch.

"Here you go, hon'," Nicole says with a smile when she's done.

"Thank you," she sighs with relief. Then she takes a bandage to wrap it 'round the stitched wound.

"How old are you, darlin'?" George asks her as he sits down on the floor in front of her. And everyone else just follows him and sits down too.

"22," she responds.

"You're too young to go through all of this," he shakes his head in disbelieve.

She laughs: "It's not like I have any other choice, you know."

"You seem tough," Keith smiles.

"Well... My mum died when I was just a baby, so I was growing up with my dad and two older brothers. And when my dad was around - he was away quite often, because of his job - he was just treating me like the third son... Which seems like a really good thing now," she smiles.

"Where are they now?" Neil asks carefully.

She shrugs: "Dunno for sure. They probably headed for our farm down the north. That's where I - we... Will be heading too. It's basically in the middle of nowhere, it should be safe down there."

"So what's the plan exactly, boss?" Keith asks. 

She laughs: "We'll stay here for one more night. It's too dangerous to go out in the dark. In the morning we'll go get some weapons... There's an army shop a few blocks from here. Let's hope there are still some weapons left. Then we'll hit the road. There's a good place a few miles from the town where we can get food supplies... If we're lucky and everything goes well, we'll reach the farm in three weeks or so."

"Sounds good to me," Keith nods.

"Alright, then," she smiles, "Now we should get some sleep. We'll be getting up at the sun dawn."

They all get up to go for their corners of the room as they're probably used to sleeping there by now and she just watches them quietly.

"Wait, guys!" she says with confusion in her voice. Everybody looks at her. "So you're all going to sleep then? Guys! You know there always has to be at least one person up to take a watch, right?"

They're all quiet.

"C'mon, really? How come you're still alive?" she laughs, "Okay, guys, go to sleep. I'll take the first watch. After few hours I'll wake up somebody else."

"I'll stay up with you," George gives her a smile and goes to sit next to her.

"You really don't have to," she smiles back.

"I know. But it just seems fair after everything you've been doing for us... And I'm not really tired yet."

"'Kay," she nods.

After few minutes of silence, when they already can hear quiet snoring from the other side of the room, George looks at her: "So... Can we talk?" he whispers.

"Sure," she whispers with a smile.

"I wanted to ask you something."

"What is it?"

"How bad is it out there?"

She sighs: "Oh... I don't wanna scare you, but... It's really bad."

He nods and stays quiet for a few seconds: "I think you're my new hero now," he says then.

She laughs quietly: "Well... In my family, giving up was never really an option, so..." she shrugs.

"You think we can make it to the farm?"

"Yes. If we stay away from big cities and don't do anything stupid... Then we'll make it. I know a good way... It's mostly through forests and fields, but there are still places where we can get food and stuff. As long as we are carefull, we will be okay."

"Alright. Sounds good to me," he smiles, "Thank you... You know... For taking care of us."

She gives him a big smile: "Save your thanks for the time when we reach the farm."

He laughs: "Okay."

"So... You think Meggie's ever gonna forgive me for what I did to her brother?"

"I think she will... Eventually."

"I really hopes so."

"Don't worry 'bout it, baby girl, you did what you had to," he gives her a reasuring smile.

And she smiles too, because for a long time now, nobody has called her like that.

"What?" he asks.

"Nothing... Just... My dad used to call me like that," she's still smiling.

"Oh... Sorry."

"No, don't be! I always like it."

"I'll remember that," he says with a smile.

"So... Who's Meggie anyway?" she asks.

"To be honest, I don't really know her, she doesn't really talk that much with us, just Ryan... She and her brother got stuck here with us and she and Ryan just hit it off. So she's always with him... Timmy was a really nice guy though."

"I bet he was!" she says with sadness in her voice, "Maybe if I'd been quicker, I could have saved him."

"Stop, darlin'! What happened to him wasn't your fault," he says and puts one arm around her shoulders.

"I know... But, still... I feel bad about him. You know... Watching people die... You can never get used to it... Even though you see that so often these days," she says and puts her head on George's shoulder.

"Don't think 'bout it now, baby girl," he whispers into her hair and she smiles.

Then they just sit there, quietly talking about their lives before all of it happened and Lily's just so happy she's not alone anymore.

Around midnight they wake up Keith and Neil for the watch and go to lay down in one corner. They lie right next to each other and before she closes her eyes she can see him smiling at her. Then she whispers goodnight and dozes off into dreamless sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

George shakes with her gently to wake her up. She opens her eyes and when she sees him, she smiles.

"Mornin', baby girl," he smiles too, "Sun's already up."

She nods and sits up. She can see everyone's already awake.

"Morning, guys," she says and they all answer back.

"Did you sleep well?" Neil asks her.

"I did. Nice change after few days," she yawns and gets up from the floor.

"Glad to hear, honey. Now eat something," Nicole smiles and brings her one energy bar.

"Thanks... So anything happaned while I was asleep?" she asks.

"Keith fell asleep on our watch," Neil says.

"Oh, really?!" she turns to Keith with fake anger.

"C'mon, man!" Keith laughs at Neil, "You didn't need to tell!"

"I'm making a mental note... Keith's not good at taking watch!" Lily laughs.

"Oh, great. Thanks Neil!" Keith gives him an angry look but then he laughs again.

Lily quickly eats the bar and then she goes to put all her weapons on herself. She always carries a gun and a knife on her belt and another knife on her thigh.

"So what now?" Colm asks her.

"Now I go find us some weapons."

"Alone?" George looks shocked.

"No. I need a few people with me so we can get as many of them as possible. Who wants to go?" she asks.

"I do," George says without hesitation.

"No, you're staying here," she shakes her head.

"Why?" he looks confused.

"Because I want... I need somebody I can trust to stay here and make sure everyone will be here and ready to leave right after we get back, 'kay?"

He hesitates for a second, then he nods: "Okay. Just be carefull out there!"

"Always," she gives him a reassuring smile, "So... Keith? Wanna redeem yourself after your night watch?" she looks at him.

"Sure thing, boss, count me in!" he winks at her.

"I wanna go," Ryan says out of the sudden.

"Nope," she shakes her head again. She feels bad about it, but she just doesn't trust him. Mainly 'cause of Meggie. Before Ryan can say a word, Lily turns to Colm: "You feel like coming with us?" she asks him, "You look like you can carry a lot," she smiles.

"Of course," he nods and gives her an insecure smile.

"Don't worry. You'll be alright," she says and he nods again, this time with more confidence.

"Should I come too?" Neil asks.

"No. I think three people will be enough," she says and heads for the counter to get her backpack from there. Then she takes her two extra knives she's got in it and gives one to Keith and the other to Colm: "Okay, guys, I want you to have them. Let's hope you won't be needing them but just in case... Just... Don't do anything stupid with them, alright?" they both nod, "Now listen carefully! Out there," she points at the door, "One little mistake, one wrong step... Can cost you your life. So you stay quiet, keep your eyes open, watch for any movement... You'll see a walker, you'll tell me! Don't be a hero! Use your common sense! And stay alive! Got it?"

"Got it!" they say unison.

"Cool!" she smiles and heads for the door. They both follow her.

Before heading out she turns back at George: "You guys, stay put until we get back. And be ready to leave!"

He nods.

"What if you don't come back?" Emmet asks.

"C'mon! Have a little faith in us," she smiles, "We will come back, I promise!"

He smiles back.

"Are you ready?" she turns to Keith and Colm. They nod.

"Let's go then" she says and open the door.

They're standing on the street in front of the door that George and Neil just closed behind them.

She looks around. The street is empty. That's a good thing.

"Okay, boys, follow me and watch your steps!" she whispers and they get going.

She leads them along the street in direction of the city center. They move as fast as they can to stay absolutely quiet.

Before the crossroad she raises one hand and they stop. Then she carefully looks around the corner.

When she turns back to them, she whispers: "I can see four walkers. They're quite far, so if we cross the road without ANY noice, they won't notice us, okay?"

"Okay," Keith whispers back and Colm just nods.

"Stay down, don't rush it... Let's go."

They manage to cross the road without any trouble and they just go on. But they can already see one walker going slowly towards them at the end of the street. She quickly make sure there are no more of them around.

"Don't worry, I take care of him. Just stay back," she whispers and goes few steps ahead.

She kills the walker with her knife and makes sure he doesn't make any noice as he falls to the ground. Then they turn right on the crossroad. The street is empty. She can't believe how lucky they are so far.

"Okay, boys, one more crossroad and we're there. You're doing great," she whispers and gives them a smile.

They arrive at the crossroad and she looks down the street where the army shop is located.

"Fuck!" she whispers. She can see at least ten walkers near the shop. It's not good but it's still managable.

"What do we do?" Colm asks.

"We'll go through them... You stay behind me! But be ready to use your knives... And remember always go for the head!"

They nod and they look determined. She smiles: "Just be carefull, okay?"

"'Kay, boss!" Keith smiles. And they get going.

As she's killing walkers, she's also making sure, boys are doing okay. And they do. She's a little bit surprised. They really don't look like they're new to all of this. She's proud of them.

They walk into the shop and close the door behind them. She looks around to make sure it's safe. There's no sign of any walkers and she feels relieved. Then she looks for any weapons. And she can see a lot of them right away.

"This is good," she says with a smile.

She goes to take two duffel bags from one shelf and starts filling them with weapons. Boys start helping her and both bags are full in a few minutes. Then she puts some more stuff into her backpack and they're ready to head back.

Keith and Colm take one bag each and Lily puts the backpack on her back and they head for the door.

As soon as they step out from the door, they can hear it. Lily's body fills with fear because she knows that sound so well.

She turns her head down the street and sees maybe 30 walkers heading in their direction. And that's just too much to deal with at once.

"Run!" she says and boys don't hesitate for even a second.  
"We need to outrun them as much as possible to buy everyone enough time to leave the hotel," she says when they're turning around the first corner.

"Let's hope they'll be ready," Keith's worried.

"Don't worry, we're all gonna make it," she gives him a quick reassuring look and he nods. Then they just run quietly and as quickly as possible.

When the hotel is in their sight, she can see Neil behind the glass. And he notices them right away and opens the door.

"Leave them opened!" she says to him as all three of them pass him by to get in, "We're leaving! Right now! Just grab your stuff and we're going."

Nobody asks any questions. There'll be time for that later. Now they just do what she says and follow her out of the door.

And their journey begins.


	3. Chapter 3

Just right by the outline of the town the forest begins. They run towards it with Lily leading the way.  
As soon as they step into the green haven, Lily turns to Keith: "You and Colm, lead everyone deeper in the woods, run for a few more minutes, then stop and wait for me. I'll be right behind, just wanna make sure they're not following us."  
"Sure thing," Keith nods, "Let's go, guys!" he gets going and the group follows.  
Lily turns back to the town and watches for any movement. She doesn't even realise that George stayed behind with her and now he's standing right behind her, watching the line of building with her. After few seconds she can feel breath on the back of her neck and she freaks out 'cause for a second she thinks it's a walker. So she quickly turns, ready to defend herself, her hand shoots up to her knife.  
"Whoa!" George laughs quietly.  
"It's not funny, Georgie! You scared the shit out of me," she shakes her head as she turns to the town again, "Please, don't do this to me ever again. You can't sneak up on me like that. I could have hurt you."  
"I'm sorry, baby girl," he whispers and kisses the back of her head. She smiles and eases up, leaning with her back on to him.  
"So what happened out there?" he asks and she can feel his hand on her hip.  
"We got to the shop quite easily. Boys did really well. But right after we step out from the shop, there was a herd of maybe 30 of them. So... We just ran."  
"I'm really glad you're okay," he whispers.  
She smiles: "Me too. And the army shop was still loaded so we've got enough weapons now."  
"Yeah, that's also a good thing."  
They are quiet for a minute.  
"Anyway... I had a huge fight with Ryan while you were away," he says then.  
"What? Why?" she turns to him.  
He shrugs: "It just kind of happened."  
"Bullshit!"  
"Language, young lady!"  
She laughs: "Sorry... Just tell me what happened."  
"Meggie talked trash about you, I called her on that, he took her side... And that just made me kinda mad."  
She sighs: "So it was because of me."  
"No, it was because of Meggie," he smiles.  
"It's not gonna end well... Me and Meggie," she says with a sad look.  
"Don't worry about that," he says and kisses her on the forehead.  
"Maybe I'll talk to her later... Now let's get going. Looks like we've lost them," she turns to look at the city for the last time and then heads to the woods. George follows.  
They catch up with the group in a few minutes. Most of them are sitting on the ground, trying to catch their breath after the run.  
When she and George walk up to them, they all look at her. She smiles.  
"What now?" Neil asks.  
"First of all, good job, guys! You all did really well. You made it out of the town. Now just remember to stay quiet and think before you do anything, okay?"  
She can hear 'okay' from some of them, the rest just nods.  
"Now... We'll take a little break. Eat something if you want. Keith and Colm... I need to talk to you," she says, smiling at the both of them. They smile back and nod. Then she takes them aside, a few metres from the group, where she sits down on the ground and they do the same. She can feel George's curious look on her back. She feels a little bit bad about it - keeping things from him. But it's just for his own good. She doesn't want him up front. George's the one she wants to protect the most. She met him just yesterday and already feels so close to him.  
"So, what's up, boss?" Keith asks her with a big smile.  
"After our little adventure today, I think I already know you're both able to survive out here... So I wanted to go through the plan with you in case... You know... Just in case," she smiles a little bit.  
"No way, Lily! I'm not doing it. There's no way we can do anything without you!"  
"Calm down, Colm! Please! I just... You need to know. SOMEONE needs to know! Anything can happen to me, I can't leave you without making sure you can make it to the safety. That's just it, I'm not arguing with you about this!"  
"Lily's right, Colm. We need to know. A lot can happen... We can get separated. More people should know. Just in case," Keith smiles and winks at Lily.  
"Thanks, Keith. I'm gonna go through it really quickly now, tell you the most important things. Let's hope there'll be time to tell you more details soon. You'll learn on the run, I guess."  
Keith laughs, Colm looks sad.  
"Cheer up, babe. It's not like I'm planning on dying any time soon, okay?" she smiles.  
"I know... It's just... I'm still processing it all," he shrugs.  
"Yeah, I get it... It's hard but you'll get used to it... Sadly," she gives him a sympathetic smile.   
"I guess," he smiles too.  
"Okay then," she opens her backpack, finds a map in there and shows it to them: "Keith, I want you to keep this map. I know the way by heart by now so I don't need it. The way I'm planning to use to get to the farm is marked here, as well as all the useful places where we can get food supplies and other things, like amo, medical supplies or just fresh water," she points her finger at few marked dots along the way.  
"Get it," Keith nods.  
"Hey, this place is somewhere nearby, right?" Colm asks and point to one of the dots.  
"Yep. Exactly. That's where we need to go right now. It's basically a supermarket. It's not located by the big road so I think there still should be a lot of stuff."  
"Awesome!" Keith smiles and he actually looks like he's having a good time. Lily can't help it but laugh: "You're such a dork!" and that's when Colm starts laughing too.  
"Okay, boys, let's quit wasting our time. We need to sort out the weapons, everyone needs at least one."  
"Do you think it's a good idea?" Keith asks.  
"Better than leaving anyone without one. Everyone needs to learn how to defend themselfs, how to survive."  
"Okay," he nods, "But... I..."  
"What?" she laughs.  
"I don't trust Meggie," he finally says.  
"Me neither," Colm adds right away like he would know what Keith was gonna say.  
She sighs: "Well... Me neither," she says and they're all quiet for a while.

"Maybe we can give a gun to Ryan a not Meggie. They're always together anyway," Keith suggest.

"That's the same thing," she shrugs.

"You don't trust Ryan?" Colm seems surprised.

"Dunno. George told me that he had an argument with him. Seems like Meggie's got quite an influence on Ryan."

"Yeah, maybe. But Ryan's not stupid, he can make his own decisions," Keith says with a hint of doubt.

"Let's hope so... But I still think even Meggie should carry a gun," Lily says and stands up. They do too and all three of them heads back to the group.

"Hey, you three fighters! Eat something," Nicole says when she notices them.

"Maybe later, Nic, we don't have time for that now," Lily smiles at her and goes for the bags of weapons.

"We need to sort out the weapons before we can go on," Keith says to everyone.

"I don't want one!" Meggie shouts out.

"Keep the volume down!" George says calmly but his angry look says he's done with her.

"Okay, you won't get one then," Keith says to Meggie without hesitation.

"You don't seem bothered about that!" Ryan gives him curious and maybe a bit angry look.

"Why whould I? She doesn't want a gun... We can't force her to carry one. It's her choice... It's her life she's risking, so... Whatever," Keith shrugs.

"What?" Ryan's shocked, "That's crazy! If everyone has to carry a gun, Meggie should too. And if she doesn't... I don't want any either!" he shakes his head.

"Oh, for crying out loud, quit being such a drama queen!" George's starting to be really angry.

"Excuse me?!" and Ryan's angry too... And Lily just stands there, watching them, and doesn't really know what to do. She knows that they're risking so much. They should get going, they need to get moving, there's no time to argue... They're just wasting time they don't have. She has to do something...

At this point George and Ryan are basically yelling at each other.

"I'm not having Meggie's bullshit anymore! She's gonna get us all killed!" George says, pointing at Meggie.

"Oh, please! That's just insane! You're just pissed at her because she doesn't like Lily!"

"Ryan, you're so stupid!" Goerge yells, making few steps towards him.

"Whoa, whoa!" Lily just jumps between them, "Just stop! You both need to calm the fuck down! We don't have time for this... Georgie, please!" she gives him a desperate look, he sighs, shakes his head and steps back.

"Keith, Colm... Take care of the weapons. Make sure everyone gets one... Me and Ryan are gonna have a little talk!" she shoots him an angry look, grabs him by his arm and leads him aside where they can talk in private.

"What the fuck, man?" she asks when they're alone.

He takes a deep breath and hides the face in his hands.

"Hey, it's gonna be okay, Ry!" she says and puts one hand on his shoulder, "Just breath. Calm down. You're gonna be alright."

"I don't know if I can do this," he whispers as he looks at her again, shaking his head.

"Of course you can do this," she smiles, "I know you care about Meggie and you want her to be okay... But... We have to be smart! And shouting in the middle of the woods isn't the smartest thing, you know."

"I know. It was stupid! I'm sorry," he gives her a sad look.

"It's okay. Just... Let's make sure it won't happen again," she winks at him.

"It won't, I promise," he smiles.

"Good."

"What are we gonna do about Meggie?" he asks then.

She shrugs: "I can't do anything... You can. It seems to me that you're the only one she'll listen to. So just try to talk some sense into her. See if she changes her mind... Till then just make sure she won't get hurt. Get a gun for yourself and be around her all the time... Can you do that?"

"I think so... I try," he smiles.

"Alright. Now... We should get going," she says and they go join the others.

"Hey, boss, the weapons are sorted out," Keith smiles proudly.

"Good job, hon'. Just give one to Ryan and we can get going."

Ryan takes a gun from Keith with a confident look and Lily realises that she's actually starting to trust him a bit.

"Okay, guys, I'm gonna lead the way," she says then, "I want you to stay together and stay close. Keith and Colm, I want you to go last, make sure nobody gets behind!" They both nod and Keith winks at her.

She laughs and they all get going.


	4. Chapter 4

It's been whole week since they started the journey. They've been through a lot but they didn't loose anyone so far. Lily always makes sure they're choosing the safe road and that they are all really careful. Keith and Colm have proven they have the guts to be up front with her and she's learnt to trust them. She has to admit it's so good to actually have somebody to rely on again. George's still trying to pursue her to let him fight too, he wants to be helpful. But she just can't. She doesn't want to risk it. She's always so worried about him and does everything possible to protect him. So far she's managing.  
Ryan's doing great job in protecting Maggie who still refuses to use a gun which is stupid, of course, but nobody, even Ryan, can't talk any sense into her.   
They've just made their way into the little town, just a few houses basically in the middle of nowhere. And as its quite late in the afternoon, Lily and her two boys just found one house and made sure it's safe to stay in for the night. It's really good to sleep inside for a change.  
The house is quite big, there are actually three bedrooms on the first floor and two sofas in the living room in the basement so there's a place for everyone. As they're all settling in, Lily makes sure nobody and nothing gets inside the house without her knowing and then she makes her way into the kitchen, where she can already find Nicole and Laura going through the cupboards.  
"Anything useful?" she asks them.  
"Hell yeah!" Nicole says with a happy smile and shows her one cupboard full of canned food which feels like a goldmine.  
"No freaking way!" Lily laughs.  
"Oh, yes! We've got pretty lucky. Dinner's gonna be good and we'll be leaving with our bags full tomorrow," Laura smiles.  
"Great! Need any help?" Lily asks.  
"Nope. Maggie's gonna help so we're okay. Dinner will be ready in no time," Nicole says as she starts preparing food.  
"Alright," Lily says with a little nod and leaves the kitchen. She goes upstairs to the room she and George are occupying. As she's making her way up the stairs she hears laughter from downstairs, probably living room where most of the group just sat down on the sofas to relax and talk a bit. It's a really good feeling to hear they're happy after couple of hard days. Just two days ago they got backed up by the herd of walkers in one town and almost didn't make it. They were pretty shaken up by that. They really needed this - this house, the roof over their heads, soft beds, the food...   
She walks in the room and sees George laying on the bed.  
"Are you okay, hon'?" she asks and walks towards the bed.  
He opens his eyes and smiles at her: "Yes. Just tired, I guess."  
"Don't worry," she says as she lays down next to him and puts her head on his shoulder, "Nicole said dinner's gonna be in a minute. Then you can go to sleep. I can manage our watch by myself tonight."  
"I'm not a baby, you know! And I'm not that old neither!"  
"I'm not saying neither of those things!" she laughs and lifts herself up on her elbows to look him in the eyes.  
"So why are you so overprotective of me?"  
"Well... I'm just worried about you, that's all. I don't wanna loose you!"  
"So... Why the hell aren't we already sleeping with each other?"  
She's quiet. Just looking into his eyes.  
Then they both start laughing.  
"Oh my god! You're so stupid, George!" she says, still laughing, "Like it's not enough Keith's already making fun of me for being in love with you!"  
"And are you?"  
"Oh, please!"  
"No. Really!" he's serious this time.  
"I don't know."  
"How can't you not know?"  
She shrugs: "I just don't... Look, Georgie!" she says, putting her head back on his shoulder and snuggling even closer to him, "I care about you a lot. You know that! But I just... There was someone... One guy I loved so much. I guess I still love him. It's complicated, you know why... Seems like eternity since I last saw him. The whole world went to shit and now it hurts to even just think about him... And when I think about you and me together, I have to think about him too. And I'm just... Not that strong to do that now. It's still too soon. And I don't have any idea where he is or what happened to him so it just feels wrong to just forget about him."  
"I'm sorry."  
"It's not your fault... Just... Don't think the reason why I'm a bit distant from you sometimes is because I don't like you or something. I'm just... Yeah... It's complicated."  
"It's okay. Really. I understand."  
She just lifts her head to lean in and kiss his cheek. Then she puts her head down again. She wishes they didn't talk about this. Now all she can think of is that gold ring she put in her backpack so she wouldn't loose it. She closes her eyes and remembers that moment she said 'I do' to him. She can see his face, his smile, his eyes. She can hear his deep velvet voice she loved so much. She hates herself for thinking about him but she also hates herself when she's not thinking about him. It hurts so bad how much she misses him, his touch, his big hugs, his sweet kisses.   
She can feel tears in her eyes but doesn't have enough strength to fight them off. So she just hugs George tighter even though she feels so bad about doing that right now but she just can't help it.  
"Oh, please, don't cry, baby. I shouldn't have brought it up, I'm sorry, it was stupid."  
"It's okay. You didn't know," she whispers, her voice is shaking.  
"Awwww! You two are so sweet, all snuggled up like this," comes from the hallway. She doesn't even have to open her eyes to know it's Keith.  
"Not now, Keith!" George says.  
"Sorry. Didn't mean to interrupt. But dinner is ready so Nicole told me to get you."  
"We'll be right down. Thanks," Lily says, sits up on the bed and quickly dries her eyes.  
"You alright, girl?" Keith asks her.  
"Of course!" she smiles at him and gets up from bed, so does George and they all head downstairs.  
"You broke her heart, big George, or what?"  
"Oh, shut your pie hole, you dork!" she slaps his shoulder.  
"Wow!" he laughs.  
They get downstairs and join others in the living room. They eat dinner while talking about the world how it used to be. They laugh too. Of course they can't be too loud but they are actually having quite a good time.  
When they're all finished with dinner, Lily sends George to bed and takes first watch by herself.   
When everybody's asleep and everything is quiet, she has to think about her 'past life'. She used to have everything. Loving father, two amazing older brothers who were there for her every time she needed them, the best guy she could have asked for as her husband, great friends, the job she loved - she was a blogger and youtuber; she managed to get out of the family business which was something nobody, including herself, didn't believe to be possible... She used to have a perfect life.   
But then everything was taken from her.  
She went for two-week trip with her two best friends and when she came back home it was already empty. The whole city was empty. Just dead people roaming around.  
All she have left now is hope.  
Hope that somebody is still alive.


	5. Chapter 5

Another week is behind them and the group is still complete.  
With every day, with every mile, Lily is more excited about getting to the farm and seeing her family. But she's also more nervous and worried that they won't be there. She just has to hope.  
In the last city they visited just this morning, they got lucky and managed to find a few small tents in one shop so they don't have to be worried about rain anymore. On the other hand, the place they were planning to visit to get food supplies was totally empty so now they're rushing to the next place because they just need to get something to eat. Lily already knows they won't make it there today. It's so late in the afternoon and they're all tired and hungry.   
"Guys, we should stop here for the night," she says when they reach the edge of the forest.  
"But we need to get some food," Keith protests.  
"And don't you think I know that?! You guys are gonna make up a camp for tonight and I'll make a run there. I should be back in an hour."  
"You crazy?! You're not going alone!" Keith shakes his head.  
She sighs: "Okay. I'm taking Maggie with me," she says without giving it a second though. After two weeks she's kind of tired of this woman being totally useless to the group. She needs to give her a lesson.  
"What?" Maggie's shocked.  
"Then I'm going too!" Ryan says.  
"Are you crazy?" Keith's as shocked as Maggie.  
"Everybody calm down, please!" Lily says calmly, "And start building the tents, please. Maggie, get ready, we'll be heading off in a few minutes."  
Then she walks towards Keith to talk to him. George automatically joins them.  
"Are you serious right now?" Keith asks her right away.  
She nods: "I am. She needs to finally learn something. She's still not able to protect herself, I'm tired of it."  
"But you can't go alone with her!" Keith shakes his head.  
"I'm not putting anybody else at risk! It's my idea. I'm going! Alone!"  
"Too bad. I'm going with you!" George says.  
She looks at him. He looks like he's not up for any debate. But she just can't take him with them.  
"You know I won't allow it!" she says calmly.  
"I'm not asking for your permission," he shakes his head, "Babe! I'm sick of you risking your life for the sake of the whole group. And this is just insane. We all know that you and Maggie aren't on the same page in anything. I'm not letting you go alone with her. That's just not happening. Deal with it."  
She just sighs. She already regrets coming up with this idea. She's okay with risking her own life. She's used to doing that. But risking anybody else's life, especially George's, that wasn't her plan.  
"You are both insane!" Keith shakes his head in disbelieve.  
"Looks like we are," George says and shrugs.  
Keith just sighs and goes to help others with tents.  
"Okay, George... Since you insist on going, let me tell you something..."  
"I know, babe. I'm gonna be really careful and I'm gonna do everything you'll tell me," he gives her a little smile.  
"You bet you will! But I also want you to promise me something."  
"What is it?"  
"If something happens, if something goes wrong, you'll just turn and run. You'll run back here and never look back," she says and looks deep into his eyes.  
"What? No... Lily, I can't promise you something like that!"  
"Georgie, please! I'll take you with us but I need... I need to know you're gonna be okay, that nothing's gonna happen to you. I can't lose you!" she whispers and makes few steps closer to him, putting one hand on his chest.  
"Well, that's the thing," he says and takes her face into his hands, running his thumb across her cheek, "I can't lose you neither! So no matter what I'll never leave you!" then he kisses her forehead and goes to get ready for the run.  
She just sighs. Then she goes to talk to Maggie and Ryan.  
"Maggie, you ready?" she asks.  
"Do I really have to go?" she seems very annoyed by the idea.  
"Yes!" Lily answers without hesitation.  
"Okay. Whatever. I'm ready."  
"Alright. Now let me talk to Ry really quickly and we'll be heading off," she gives her a little smile. But Maggie just sighs and goes to join George.  
"You know what to do, right?" Lily asks Ryan, talking about protection of the camp for the night, as Ryan is actually the only person who always helps her with that. Just a few days after their journey began she learnt he's able to move quite quickly, and most importantly, quietly so he was the best choice for making sure the camp and everybody in it are safe for the night.  
"Of course," he nods, "Will you three be okay?" he asks with worries in his voice.  
"We will," she smiles.  
"Okay. Just... Be safe, alright?"  
"Like you don't know me!" she laughs but she's starting to feel nervous, "We should head out, so..."  
Ryan nods but doesn't say anything.  
"We'll be back... Soon!" she says then and without waiting for his response she just turns away and walks towards George and Maggie who are already waiting for her.  
"Let's go, guys," she says to them and they head off.  
It's not very far and they keep quite a quick pace, so in about twenty minutes they're arriving at the place. It's quite a big supermarket by a side road and it seems quiet all around.  
"So far, so good," she whispers as she's looking around.  
"So can we... Like... Get it over with?" Maggie asks, still pretty annoyed she needs to be here.  
"We need to be careful!" George whispers.  
"Yes, we do! But it's getting dark, we should really hurry up. Let's go inside."  
They head for the front entrance. The doors are open which is not a very good sign but there's nothing they can do about it. They walk in. It's dark inside, but quiet.  
"Be careful, okay? Both of you!" she whispers to them, "Let's find something to eat and get out of here!"  
They slowly walk towards walls of shelves to look for something to grab. They split to cover more space. Pretty soon Lily comes across a shelf with canned food and takes off her backpack to put some in. When she has enough she puts the backpack back on but before she can do anything else she hears that horrible sound of walkers growling and her blood runs cold.  
She can't see anything. She starts to feel sick to her stomach and tries really hard to push the fear away. She needs to find others.  
"Georgie?" she whispers but gets no response.   
After a few seconds of slowly walking along the shelves she finds him further back inside the shop with Maggie by his side.  
"There you are," she whispers more to herself than anybody else and sighs with a little relief. George's just putting his backpack on which means he's found some food too.  
"We got lucky," Maggie says pretty loudly and Lily feels like punching her in the face.  
"Shut the fuck up!" she whispers angrily but it's already too late.   
At the end of the alley there comes a group of maybe ten walkers and cuts them off from the front door.   
"Shit!" Lily curses.  
"Damn it, Maggie!" George gives her an angry look.  
"How was I supposed to know they're around?" Maggie seems almost offended.  
"They are always around!" Lily says without even looking at her.   
"What now, Lil?" George asks and even though he's trying hard not to show it, Lily can hear he's scared.  
"This place should have a back door. Let's go!" she says and heads for the back of the store. They follow her.   
As they're turning around the first corner she hears George's quiet curse. Lily turns her head to see he's cut his right calf by something sharp that was sticking out from one shelf.   
"Fuck!" Lily curses and goes to see his wound. It's pretty deep.  
"We can't stop!" Maggie says, terrified.  
"You don't fucking say!" Lily whispers, "C'mon, Georgie, it's not far! I'll take care of the wound when we get out," she says, puts his right arm around her shoulders and helps him walk. He can't really put any weight on the wounded leg so they walk much slower.  
When they turn around another corner they can already see the back door at the end of the alley.   
"Maggie, run ahead to open the door and hold them for us!" Lily gives her an order and Maggie does as she's told.  
Lily watches Maggie struggling with the door for a few seconds before opening them. Then she stands there, holding the door open and watching as Lily and George are slowly approaching. George is slowing down with every other step. He's losing his strength along with quite a lot of blood.  
"Hold on, Georgie, for just a few more seconds," Lily whispers to him, he says nothing.  
But then... As Lily looks ahead, her eyes meet Maggie's and she just knows... She can see it in her eyes... All that anger, disgust, desire for revenge... This is the moment Maggie's been waiting on probably from the very beginning, from the very first moment she and Lily met... That moment when she watched Lily  _kill_ her brother.   
Almost like in slow motion Lily watches Maggie closing the door. Last thing she sees is that evil smirk on Meggie's lips. Lily wants to scream. But she knows it's not gonna help anyway.  
They get to the door. Of course, Maggie had to barricade it somehow from the outside as Lily tries and fails in opening them again. They're trapped.  
She looked at George. He's struggling even just to stand, using only his left leg. Lily feels her throat tightening and her hands shaking. She's never been more scared. But she's not afraid for herself. No. Whatever is gonna happen to her, she doesn't care. But George... He has to survive! He has to live!   
She's desperately trying to think of something to do. She looks down the alley. The herd is at the other end of it, but they're closing in pretty quickly.  
She looks back at George, he's looking down on his wounded leg.  
"We have to try to make it back to the front door," she says.  
He looks up at her and shakes his head.  
"C'mon, Georgie, we have to hurry!" she tries again.  
"No."  
"What?"  
"Give me your gun! And take this," he says taking his backpack off and giving it to her.  
"What? Why?"  
"Just give me your gun! And go!"  
"What do you mean?" she asks, still confused, but takes the backpack from him.  
"We don't have time for this, Lily! Just give it to me and leave! We'd never make it. I can't even walk. It's the end of the road for me. But you will make it! Just go! Leave me! I'll hold them here, buy you some time!"  
"No! I'm not leaving you!"  
"Yes, you are! You're not gonna die because of me! Give me your gun!" he says but instead of waiting for her reaction, he just leans forward and grabs her gun for himself.  
She's not able to say a single word, she's just staring at him, not able to comprehend what's going on.  
"You're gonna make it, okay?!" he says, holding one of her hands and looking into her eyes, "You're gonna be okay!"  
She nods without even realizing it.  
"Make sure Maggie's not gonna kill anybody else!"  
She just nods again.  
"Now go! Hurry!" he orders, but before he lets go of her hand, he pulls her closer just for a very short moment and in his last desperate action kisses her lips passionately.   
When their lips part, he pushes her away. "Go!" he yells at her and turns away to face the herd.  
She hesitates for one more second before turning around and heading for the front entrance. Tears are streaming down her cheeks as she hears shots and George cursing and screaming behind her.


	6. Chapter 6

She steps out from the store. It's already pitch black outside. Her heart is pounding, her hands are still shaking and her eyes are filled with tears. She feels like the biggest failure. This was all her fault. She was the one who wanted Maggie to go with them, this was all just her idea. She's the one to blame for George's death... George's death... George's dead...  
She feels like she's just lost her reason to fight.  
It's quiet all around. She slowly starts walking in the direction of their camp.  
Everything is playing in her head over and over again. That last moment... He was so brave, so determined... He sacrificed himself for her... How can she live with herself now? How can she live without him?  
The kiss.  
She sees that moment so vividly in her mind.  
Her worst nightmare has just come true. She lost him. She failed in protecting him. One thing she's always wanted to do - protect George. She failed.   
All because for the first time she decided to trust Maggie even though she knew she really can't be trusted.   
Maggie wanted the revenge for the death of her brother. She wanted Lily to die. But George's the one who paid the price. Now Lily will blame herself for all of this, for the rest of her life.   
As she's nearing the camp, the tears are still coming down her cheeks. She feels so weak. But she knows she can't really afford that - to be weak, to give up - there are still people who rely on her, who need her.   
She can see the light of a small campfire. She doesn't even know what she's gonna do when she gets there.  
She's just a few steps from the camp, she can see Maggie sitting there, crying, having Ryan's arm around her shoulders. Everyone seems really sad. Lily's a bit confused by that but then she realises that Maggie probably told them some kind of tragic story about how she and George died and Maggie barely made it out alive. And it just makes Lily so mad!  
She steps into the light. Everyone seems shocked, but Maggie definitely the most. She probably didn't expect Lily to survive, to come back. Nobody says a word. They just stare at Lily and her tears and they just seem very confused.  
Lily reaches for the knife on her belt and in that moment Maggie looks terrified. As she should be.  
Without a single word, Lily quickly walks towards Maggie, with the knife in her hand, pushes Ryan aside and grabbing Maggie under her neck she pushes her back to the ground.   
"Whoa, whoa, Lily! What's going on?" Lily hears Keith but doesn't pay any attention to his words.  
Instead, she looks deeply into Maggie's eyes: "One reason... One good reason not to kill you right now! Go! Now! Quickly! Or I swear, I will fucking kill you!" she whispers through her clinched teeth.  
"I... I... I'm sorry?" Maggie stutters.  
"Fuck off! That's the last thing you are! I saw that... I saw you fucking smiling as you were shutting those doors, leaving us there to die!"   
And Maggie just doesn't know what to say to that.  
Keith's the one who breaks the silence: "Lily, please! Could you explain what's going on?"  
Lily hesitates but after few more seconds she gives up: "Fuck it! You're not worth it!" she says to Maggie and gets up, leaving her lying there on the ground, and puts the knife back to her belt.  
Ignoring Keith's question, she takes both backpacks off and hand them to Nicole: "Here's some food. Ya'll must be hungry."  
"I don't care about food right now!" Keith doesn't give up, "What happened there?"  
"And what do you want me to say?" Lily loses the temper, "That I fucked up! Trusting her even though you... And George told me not to... But I was just fucking stupid. And now George's dead and I hate myself because it's all my fault!" new tears are streaming down from her eyes. Nobody says a word as she goes to sit down by the fire to cry.  
"Just eat something, guys!" she whispers after a while, her voice shaking.  
Nobody moves, both backpacks are lying on the ground by Nicole's feet. Lily just sits there. Heartbroken.  
After a while, Keith just walks towards her, sits down next to her, puts one arm around her shoulders and pulls her closer. And she just cries.  
"I'm so sorry, las," he whispers, soothing her hair with one hand, "I know how close you two were."  
"It's not fair!" she tries so hard to keep her voice strong but it's still a bit shaky, "I was the one who fucked up. But he's the one who died. Just... Why?" she shakes her head.  
"It's not your fault, honey!" Nicole says and goes to sit down next to her.  
"It feels like it," Lily looks at Nicole with her teary eyes.  
"So what exactly happened? What did Maggie do?" Colm asks from behind them.  
"Doesn't really matter now," Lily shrugs.  
"Yes, it does!" he protests and goes to stand in front of her.  
She just shakes her head.  
"I want to know what she did. We all need to know how bad it was... To what extent she can't be trusted."  
"She couldn't be trusted before, she can't be trusted now. That's it. There's nothing we can do about it anyway," Lily capitulates. She doesn't care about Maggie anymore.  
"I bet there is something we could do!" Keith says.  
"What?" Lily looks at him.  
"Well... If she's somehow the reason George died, then I don't want her here anymore!" Keith says without even giving it a second thought.  
"Me neither!" Colm adds.  
"What? You can't be serious?" Ryan's shocked.  
Lily has no strength to fight with anyone anymore so she stays quiet.  
"I bet it all was just an accident. Maggie didn't mean for that to happen, right?" Ryan says looking at her.  
Maggie looks up at him: "I didn't want George to die. It wasn't meant to happen," she says, shaking her head.  
"See!" Ryan looks at Colm.  
"I just wanted  _her_ to die," Maggie says then and everybody just stares at her, except Lily, she already knew that.  
"What?!" Ryan's the first one who manages to collect himself enough to speak.  
"Oh, don't play stupid, Ryan! You all knew I hate her for what she did to my brother. Something like this was bound to happen sooner or later. And you all heard her, George's death was her fault. She left him there!" it's clear how much she enjoys seeing Lily suffer.   
"How could you?" Ryan whispers, looking at Maggie with disgust.  
"I want you to leave! Right now!" Keith gets up from the ground, gives Maggie a look filled with absolute hate and points one finger to the darkness outside the camp. She looks shocked and terrified.  
"Keith no! Please stop!" Lily gets up too and puts one hand on his shoulder.  
"She can't stay here, Lily!" Colm says.  
"We lost George today," Lily whispers, her voice breaking, "We won't lose anybody else. If she left now, in the middle of the night, she wouldn't go far, we all know that."  
"And how is that a bad thing? After what she did?" Keith asks.  
"Look, I hate her as much as you do... Maybe even more... But this is not how we do things!" she shakes her head.  
"Lily, she just told us she wants you dead. We can't be sure she won't do anything else again!" Colm protests.  
"You're right, we can't. So we're just gonna watch her all the time, like we have already been doing up to this point. And she doesn't even carry any weapon anyway," Lily says.  
Keith shakes his head but doesn't say a word. Neither does Colm. So it seems like a finished business.  
"Now, please, everybody eat something and get some sleep. I'll stay up all night, I wouldn't be able to sleep anyway," Lily says and sits down again.  
Nicole and Laura open both backpacks and hand everyone a little something to eat.   
When Nicole goes to give one energy bar to Lily, she just shakes her head: "I'm not hungry."  
"Then eat it when you are," Nicole gives her a little smile and puts the bar next to Lily.  
"Thanks," she whispers.  
Everybody eats quietly, nobody says a word. After that they all start getting up to get ready for sleeping.  
"I'll stay up with you, okay?" Keith says, sitting next to her.  
"Okay, thanks," she nods.  
Then Ryan goes over to her: "Lily, would you mind... If I used your tent? I don't want to sleep in the same one as Maggie."  
"Of course I wouldn't, Ry. Go ahead, I won't use it anyway. Sleep well," she gives him a little smile.  
"Thank you," he smiles back.  
"And Ry?" she says before he walks away, "I'm really sorry about what Maggie did. I know you really cared about her."  
"She's the one who should be sorry," he shrugs, "Good night."  
"Good night," she says and he walks away to disappear in her tent a second later.   
Everybody else also gets into their tents for the night so she and Keith are alone at last.  
"I'm not really in a mood for talking. Hope you won't mind," she says and looks at him.  
"Don't worry about it, las. We don't have to talk. Just remember I'm here for you when you're ready to talk about it," he smiles and puts an arm around her shoulders.  
"Thanks," she whispers, putting her head on his shoulder.  
They sit there like that quietly as minutes and hours go by.  
All she can think about is George and her own broken heart.


	7. Chapter 7

Around midnight Keith starts having problems with keeping his eyes open so Lily sends him into his tent to get some sleep.   
Everything is quiet.  
She's not crying anymore. That's a progress.   
Minutes go by.  
Hours go by.  
Her watch shows a few minutes to five. The sun should appear at the east pretty soon.  
But for now it's still darkness all around.  
Her head is still not able to fully comprehend that George's gone. It's almost like he'd be in one of those tents, sleeping, and she's here to make sure he's safe.   
The realisation that she failed in protecting him is so painful.   
But then she would swear she heard something. She quickly gets up and stares into the darkness in the direction the sound came from. She reaches for her knife, ready to defend herself. In a second it's clear that she hears steps. In another second a tall figure steps into the light.   
Lily's afraid she's gone insane and she's actually hallucinating but...   
"George?" she whispers in a shock.  
"Hey, baby girl," he smiles, limping towards the fire.  
"Oh my god!" she says as she realises it's not a dream and he's really here, alive. "How?" is all she manages to say when he sits down.   
"To be honest, I'm not really sure," he laughs quietly.  
Then she remembers how he hurt his leg. She looks at it to see he wraps his shirt around it: "Oh, look at that! You could be a doctor!" she says with a smile as she kneels down to look at his wound.  
"That's what I thought too!" he laughs again.  
Before Lily removes the shirt from his leg, one more thought runs through her head: "Georgie... Are you bitten?" she asks, extremely worried about what his answer's gonna be.   
He shakes his head: "Surprisingly, I'm not. Don't worry, I checked. If I were, I would never come back here," he gives her a reassuring smile and she sighs with relieve.  
"Alright, now, let me look at your leg," she says, unwrapping the shirt.  
"Be my guess."  
"Damn, it's pretty deep!"   
"Could be worse... I'm alive after all. We both are! That's what matters!" he smiles.  
And out of the blue, she hugging him so tight. She still can't really believe it but he's here, alive. And she's so happy about that. Her sight is getting little blurry even though she's trying so hard not to cry.  
"It's alright, baby girl. I'm still here. I'm not going anywhere," he whispers into her ear, returning the hug.  
"Alright," she says, pulling away to look into his eyes, "We're gonna talk about everything later," it's clear to both of them she's talking about the kiss, "But now you need stitches. So I'm gonna go wake Nicole up because I feel like she's so much better than me in making them. And I don't wanna cause you any unnecessary pain," she gets up, "Stay here. I'll be right back."  
She heads for Neil and Nicole's tent and carefully gets inside.   
Even though she's trying really hard, as she's waking up Nicole, Neil wakes up to.  
"I'm sorry I woke you, guys, but I really need your help, Nicole," she gives both of them an apologetic smile.  
"It's alright, Lily. What's going on? Is everything okay?" Nicole asks as she follows Lily out of the tent with Neil right behind them.  
"Hey, guys," George says to both of them and they just stare in complete shock. George laughs as Lily goes to get a medical kit from Nicole's backpack.  
"I need you, Nic, to make a few stitches on George's leg," Lily says when she's kneeling by his side again.  
"Of course," Nicole nods and sits down next to Lily.  
Lily takes a little bottle of alcohol from medical kit to pour some on Nicole's hands and a needle with a piece of thread.  
"You ready, Georgie?" she asks him then. He just nods and she pours some alcohol on his wound. He closes his eyes and clinches his teeth.  
When Nicole's making the stitches, Lily's holding George's hand.   
"Almost done," Nicole says after a while and George smiles a bit.  
When the stitches are all done, Nicole wraps a clean bandage around the wound and Lily finds some antibiotics and pain killers in a medical kit. Neil brings a bottle of water and George swallows a few pills.  
"That should do," Lily smiles and gives George a hug.  
"Thanks, guys," he says.  
"You hungry?" Nic asks him then.  
"Not really. I'm a bit tired though."  
"Yeah, you should get some rest," Lily nods, "I guess we can stay here for one more night. You shouldn't really be walking anyway right now. And we have enough food to go by for now."  
"You can use our tent," Neil offers.  
"Sounds good to me," George nods with a smile.  
Neil and Lily help him get up and walk over to the tent.  
Lily then gets inside the tent with him, watching him lie down.  
"So you wanna talk now?" George asks with a tired smile.  
She shakes her head: "You need to get some sleep now, you had pretty rough night. There'll be time to talk later," she says, leaning down to kiss his forehead.   
"Okay," he whispers with his eyes already closed.  
Lily gets up and leaves the tent.   
The sun is already rising at the east, the darkness is fading.  
As soon as Lily gets out from the tend, Keith's by her side: "Is it true? Has George come back?" he asks with happy smile.  
She nods: "Yeah, he has. He just needs some rest, but he'll be alright."  
"Oh, I'm so happy to hear that, las!" he laughs and gives her a hug, "But... How did he get out of there?" he asks then.  
"Well... When I asked him, he told me he doesn't even know," she laughs quietly and shakes her head as she and Keith walk over to the camp fire to help Nicole with preparing breakfast, "But he's not bitten and he seems okay, apart from the wounded leg... But he got that before the herd got to him. So... I don't really care how... I'm just happy he's alive."  
"Yeah, we all are," Nicole smiles as she's getting beans out of the can.  
"So we're staying here for one more night?" Keith asks then.  
Lily nods: "George needs to get a proper rest. So does his leg. And I guess... We all could use a little break."  
"For sure!" Keith laughs.


End file.
